"Lost Time", Mass Effect 2 fanfic
Feb. 6th, 2010 12:16 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
4thofelevenHaven't written any fic for a while, but I felt a part of the game’s story needed a bit more development, so I threw this fic together.
Title: Lost Time
Fandom: Mass Effect
Categories: G, fShepard/Liara
Disclaimer: Mass Effect and all characters, locations, ect. remain the property of BioWare. No copyright infringement is intended.
Summary: Commander Shepard reflects on meeting Liara again. Minor spoilers for Mass Effect 2.
Shepard glanced again at the hologram on her desk. It wasn’t even a good picture – a cropped version of one of the holos they’d taken at the celebrations after Saren’s defeat. Shepard hadn’t realised she didn’t have a proper picture of Liara until a few days ago – before then, they hadn’t ever been apart long enough for her to need one. And now…
Shepard sighed, idly rubbing at the scar on her cheek, before remembering as her hand touched her skin that the scar was gone. Cerberus had to grow new skin for her face, and hadn’t bothered to recreate all the little imperfections created by a lifetime of struggle. They’d taken away from her that legacy of Akuze. How much else had they taken from her? How much else of her past had she lost?
Two years, she thought to herself. Could it really have been two years? She hadn’t believed it at first – didn’t believe anything Cerberus agents said. Then she’d met Garrus and Tali again, and they’d confirmed it, but then they’d fallen so easily back into their old roles as part of the team. It hadn’t really sunk in just how much time had really passed until she met Liara again.
What did you expect, Shepard? A voice in the back of her head asked. That she’d spend two years pining for you? She’s tougher than she looks – you wouldn’t have fallen for her otherwise.
She thought she’d be able to accept it. They’d never talked about it, but Asari live much longer than humans, and Liara was still very young by her people’s standards. She knew that Liara must have long ago come to terms with the fact that she’d probably outlive Shepard by centuries. But seeing her again in that office on Illum, seeing the hints in her eyes that she’d already accepted Shepard’s death and moved on…
Shepard had seen it when she entered the office, felt it in her body when they embraced. Stiff, cold – just going through the motions, the passions they’d once shared missing. It had been as if she’d been embracing a stranger. Oh, Liara had explained afterwards all she’d done to protect Shepard’s body, that she’d rescued it from the Collectors and given it to Cerberus so they could rebuild her; revive her, breathe life back into her. But there’d never been any guarantees Project Lazarus would work, and Shepard couldn’t help but feel Liara had come to accept that.
What was that old theory about the stages of grief? Denial, Bargaining, but then acceptance? Shepard thought to herself. Liara had been grasping at straws when she made the deal with Cerberus. Two years is a long time to wait for a dead woman. How long did it take? Two months? Six? A year? Doesn’t matter – in the end, she’d realised she’d probably never see me alive again, and began living her own life again.
Part of her – a petty, selfish part of her – wanted to contact Liara again, tell her their relationship was over, find a new lover and prove to the Asari that she wasn’t going to embarrass herself any further pursuing an affair that Liara had clearly given up on.
Wouldn’t be too hard, after all. Shepard thought to herself. I’m the hero of the Citadel! I could have my pick of any sapient in the galaxy – hell, that damn Cerberus yeoman already practically throws herself at me whenever I walk past her.
But I don’t want her. I don’t want my pick of the galaxy’s beauties. I want the woman I fell in love with. I want Liara. But if she doesn’t want me any more…
“Damn, I’ve got to stop thinking about this.” Shepard said to herself. “Hiding here in my quarters isn’t doing my any good.”
She looked around the room. Too empty. She thought to herself. Too big. This wasn’t the Spartan quarters of an alliance officer – this was a luxury suite. Just the sort of thing a Cerberus commander would expect – Decadent luxuries for someone who thinks of themselves as making the hard decisions for Earth, yet has never had to face the consequences for their actions.
“I need to get out of this cavern and talk to someone.” Shepard muttered. “Get Liara out of my head for a few hours.”
* * *
“Shepard! What can I do for you?” Tali spun around as she saw the commander approach.
“Just wanted to talk.” Shepard smiled. It was nice to have one person on the ship she could relax around. Joker was too trusting of Cerberus for her to open up to him anymore, and Garrus… Garrus was a good friend, but not somebody she really wanted to confide in.
“No problems down here?” She asked the Quarian.
“Not as bad as it could be.” Tali said as they walked over to the Normandy’s drive core. “The engineers mostly leave me alone, and Jack makes sure the rest of the crew don’t come down here. That poor woman, Shepard! When this is over-“
“Cerberus will pay, Tali.” Shepard said. “I promise.”
They stood silently for a moment, looking at the patterns of light on the ship’s element zero drive core.
“This is a wonderful ship.” Tali said. “It deserves a better crew than Cerberus. The old Normandy crew – it felt like being on a Flotilla ship. We were a team, we knew could trust each other completely. Now…”
“I know what you mean.” Shepard nodded. When having someone like Jack around makes you feel safer… Mercenaries and assassins and murderers –and they’re not the ones I’m afraid of. “I’m glad you and Garrus are still here to watch my back. I wish more of the others were here, but I can’t bring anyone else into this nest of vipers unless I really need them-“
Shepard stopped. Something about what she’d said was reminding her of something. She just couldn’t quite work it out-
“No, you’re right, Shepard.” Tali said. “Recruiting the old team wouldn’t get rid of Cerberus. I don’t want anyone else risking their lives here.”
Of course. Shepard thought, finally managing to organise her train of thought. I don’t want the old team here – and if Liara walked onboard the Normandy right now I’d do everything in my power to get her out of here, to keep her from following me into danger.
Even if the only way I could be sure she’d leave was to make her think I didn’t care for her any more.
She smiled for the first time in days.
Whatever Liara’s trying to do now, she’s tied up with people as dangerous as Cerberus. I don’t know everything that’s happened to her in the last two years – but the Liara I fell in love with would go to the same lengths I would to keep the woman she loved safe.
Two years might be a long time, but it’s not nearly long enough for me to stop trusting her.
“It’s getting late, Tali.” Shepard said. “I think I’m going to head up and try and get some sleep.
Tali – thanks again for agreeing to come along. I know this can’t be easy for you.”
“You need my help to stop the Collectors.” Tali replied. “I’m always here for you if you need me.”
“Well, I appreciate it.” Shepard smiled. “Thank you.”
Shepard walked more easily as she made her way back to her quarters, a great weight over her now forgotten.
Alone in engineering, Tali’zorah sighed.
“I’ll always be here for you, Shepard.” She said quietly to herself.
Title: Lost Time
Fandom: Mass Effect
Categories: G, fShepard/Liara
Disclaimer: Mass Effect and all characters, locations, ect. remain the property of BioWare. No copyright infringement is intended.
Summary: Commander Shepard reflects on meeting Liara again. Minor spoilers for Mass Effect 2.
Shepard glanced again at the hologram on her desk. It wasn’t even a good picture – a cropped version of one of the holos they’d taken at the celebrations after Saren’s defeat. Shepard hadn’t realised she didn’t have a proper picture of Liara until a few days ago – before then, they hadn’t ever been apart long enough for her to need one. And now…
Shepard sighed, idly rubbing at the scar on her cheek, before remembering as her hand touched her skin that the scar was gone. Cerberus had to grow new skin for her face, and hadn’t bothered to recreate all the little imperfections created by a lifetime of struggle. They’d taken away from her that legacy of Akuze. How much else had they taken from her? How much else of her past had she lost?
Two years, she thought to herself. Could it really have been two years? She hadn’t believed it at first – didn’t believe anything Cerberus agents said. Then she’d met Garrus and Tali again, and they’d confirmed it, but then they’d fallen so easily back into their old roles as part of the team. It hadn’t really sunk in just how much time had really passed until she met Liara again.
What did you expect, Shepard? A voice in the back of her head asked. That she’d spend two years pining for you? She’s tougher than she looks – you wouldn’t have fallen for her otherwise.
She thought she’d be able to accept it. They’d never talked about it, but Asari live much longer than humans, and Liara was still very young by her people’s standards. She knew that Liara must have long ago come to terms with the fact that she’d probably outlive Shepard by centuries. But seeing her again in that office on Illum, seeing the hints in her eyes that she’d already accepted Shepard’s death and moved on…
Shepard had seen it when she entered the office, felt it in her body when they embraced. Stiff, cold – just going through the motions, the passions they’d once shared missing. It had been as if she’d been embracing a stranger. Oh, Liara had explained afterwards all she’d done to protect Shepard’s body, that she’d rescued it from the Collectors and given it to Cerberus so they could rebuild her; revive her, breathe life back into her. But there’d never been any guarantees Project Lazarus would work, and Shepard couldn’t help but feel Liara had come to accept that.
What was that old theory about the stages of grief? Denial, Bargaining, but then acceptance? Shepard thought to herself. Liara had been grasping at straws when she made the deal with Cerberus. Two years is a long time to wait for a dead woman. How long did it take? Two months? Six? A year? Doesn’t matter – in the end, she’d realised she’d probably never see me alive again, and began living her own life again.
Part of her – a petty, selfish part of her – wanted to contact Liara again, tell her their relationship was over, find a new lover and prove to the Asari that she wasn’t going to embarrass herself any further pursuing an affair that Liara had clearly given up on.
Wouldn’t be too hard, after all. Shepard thought to herself. I’m the hero of the Citadel! I could have my pick of any sapient in the galaxy – hell, that damn Cerberus yeoman already practically throws herself at me whenever I walk past her.
But I don’t want her. I don’t want my pick of the galaxy’s beauties. I want the woman I fell in love with. I want Liara. But if she doesn’t want me any more…
“Damn, I’ve got to stop thinking about this.” Shepard said to herself. “Hiding here in my quarters isn’t doing my any good.”
She looked around the room. Too empty. She thought to herself. Too big. This wasn’t the Spartan quarters of an alliance officer – this was a luxury suite. Just the sort of thing a Cerberus commander would expect – Decadent luxuries for someone who thinks of themselves as making the hard decisions for Earth, yet has never had to face the consequences for their actions.
“I need to get out of this cavern and talk to someone.” Shepard muttered. “Get Liara out of my head for a few hours.”
* * *
“Shepard! What can I do for you?” Tali spun around as she saw the commander approach.
“Just wanted to talk.” Shepard smiled. It was nice to have one person on the ship she could relax around. Joker was too trusting of Cerberus for her to open up to him anymore, and Garrus… Garrus was a good friend, but not somebody she really wanted to confide in.
“No problems down here?” She asked the Quarian.
“Not as bad as it could be.” Tali said as they walked over to the Normandy’s drive core. “The engineers mostly leave me alone, and Jack makes sure the rest of the crew don’t come down here. That poor woman, Shepard! When this is over-“
“Cerberus will pay, Tali.” Shepard said. “I promise.”
They stood silently for a moment, looking at the patterns of light on the ship’s element zero drive core.
“This is a wonderful ship.” Tali said. “It deserves a better crew than Cerberus. The old Normandy crew – it felt like being on a Flotilla ship. We were a team, we knew could trust each other completely. Now…”
“I know what you mean.” Shepard nodded. When having someone like Jack around makes you feel safer… Mercenaries and assassins and murderers –and they’re not the ones I’m afraid of. “I’m glad you and Garrus are still here to watch my back. I wish more of the others were here, but I can’t bring anyone else into this nest of vipers unless I really need them-“
Shepard stopped. Something about what she’d said was reminding her of something. She just couldn’t quite work it out-
“No, you’re right, Shepard.” Tali said. “Recruiting the old team wouldn’t get rid of Cerberus. I don’t want anyone else risking their lives here.”
Of course. Shepard thought, finally managing to organise her train of thought. I don’t want the old team here – and if Liara walked onboard the Normandy right now I’d do everything in my power to get her out of here, to keep her from following me into danger.
Even if the only way I could be sure she’d leave was to make her think I didn’t care for her any more.
She smiled for the first time in days.
Whatever Liara’s trying to do now, she’s tied up with people as dangerous as Cerberus. I don’t know everything that’s happened to her in the last two years – but the Liara I fell in love with would go to the same lengths I would to keep the woman she loved safe.
Two years might be a long time, but it’s not nearly long enough for me to stop trusting her.
“It’s getting late, Tali.” Shepard said. “I think I’m going to head up and try and get some sleep.
Tali – thanks again for agreeing to come along. I know this can’t be easy for you.”
“You need my help to stop the Collectors.” Tali replied. “I’m always here for you if you need me.”
“Well, I appreciate it.” Shepard smiled. “Thank you.”
Shepard walked more easily as she made her way back to her quarters, a great weight over her now forgotten.
Alone in engineering, Tali’zorah sighed.
“I’ll always be here for you, Shepard.” She said quietly to herself.
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no subject
on 2010-02-05 03:55 pm (UTC)Obviously it's meant to be just be a one-shot, but I can't help but want to see Liara help Shepard make that cabin seem more like home...
no subject
on 2010-02-06 04:56 am (UTC)I'm not sure if the Normandy-2's quarters are meant to come across so blatantly as a Cerberus bribe, but it occurred to me that they could well be the largest room an Earthborn Shepard's ever had to herself...
no subject
on 2010-02-05 06:35 pm (UTC)Really enjoyed this. I'd love a sequal with Tali as a more driving point, but I love Tali in general, so I'm biased. The story made you feel for basically all characters involved for being in such a tough situation.
Well done :)
no subject
on 2010-02-06 05:08 am (UTC)I like Tali too - actually, I like her a lot more than I do Liara. I might try and write something about her later.
no subject
on 2010-02-05 07:35 pm (UTC)no subject
on 2010-02-06 05:00 am (UTC)no subject
on 2010-02-06 01:49 am (UTC)